Hiding Does Not Make The Problem Go Away

So here I sit, again..

I am in the same old seat as I used to be. I am depressed. I am binge eating, and I am finding myself getting back to my old state of mind. “Maybe if I don’t eat as much, I’ll be thinner”. I cannot believe I am posting this to the world.. but I fear I need you help more then ever.

I have to break this cycle that women go through!! I want to live a healthy and happy life but all I can think about anymore is how great I would look in a bikini if I really stuck to it.. but then again my outter looks should not be the issue. I have to change how I feel and my self-esteem.

I have suffered through eating disorders, and I do not want to go down that path! It’s scary, depressing and even life threatening. And unfortunately for me, I am an emotional eater! Once I get upset, I eat. If I’m mad I eat.

The most horrid thing about this is that I am not even overweight! Sure I have cellulite and bumps here and there that I try to hide, but I want to love my body and I want to love myself 😥

Sorry I have been gone so long but I am back, I realized I DO need help! Beating out what society’s image of “beautiful” is the hardest thing we ladies have to deal with and I am determined to deal with it head on!!

So, again sorry I have been gone.. but I am happy to be back!

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4 Comments

  1. Jessi! said,

    June 18, 2009 at 7:29 pm

    Welcome back.
    I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling down :(.
    Just know that you have friends and a boyfriend who love you and are there for you always 🙂 … SMILE! … you are sexy ;).

  2. Wiggs said,

    June 18, 2009 at 8:27 pm

    Well, hun, it looks like you need to give yourself a nice long talking-to. You KNOW that it’s unhealthy to think this way. Listen to your body, value your body, and be thankful you’ve got arms and legs that are strong enough to carry you where you need to go in life. They deserve love and respect!

    Here’s what I would do if I were you: do 30 minutes of your favorite exercise, even if it’s just a stroll around the neighborhood. Then go to the grocery store and buy the ingredients for a delicious, wholesome meal packed with nutrients. Make yourself a healthy, yummy dinner that will be a pleasure to eat, and savor every bite because you deserve it.

    And remember this: even supermodels have cellulite. I sure as heck do. But people won’t pay attention to that if you’re confident and happy. You might need to get stern with yourself to break out of the cycle you’re in right now, but you’ll get there…and we’re all here to help!

  3. nessa said,

    June 18, 2009 at 9:13 pm

    Welcome back.. i totally feel ya. 😥 I’ve broken down and cired because of my weight before.. and im not that heavy!! I get “normal” and “skinny” for my body.. but id ont feel it. I kil myslef with negative thoughts sometimes and i just need to stop!! Lord help us both!! Xoxo’s your way!

  4. smallchangesaddup said,

    June 19, 2009 at 10:47 am

    I so so wish I could help you. I can completely relate to every word you wrote, because unfortunately I’m in the same boat. Binge eating is so destructive, and I wish I had the answers and could tell you (and myself) how to stop. At least you’re aware of the problem and you’re seeking help – that’s such a huge first step.

    All you can do is take things one day at a time. You need to eat, you know that. Try to focus on good, healthy foods that make you feel good about yourself. Don’t restrict foods or you’ll probably end up binging on them. Get out and do things that make you happy. Don’t sit in the house alone.

    You’ll get there…we both will. In the meantime, just keep trying your best to live a happy and healthy life – that’s all you can do.

    If you want to discuss this more, email me on sam.smallchangesaddup.wordpress.com – we might be able to help each other! *Hugs*.

    http://smallchangesaddup.wordpress.com


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